Five Ways You Can Support a Caregiver

According to a recent study, more than 53 million people in the United States provide unpaid care for a loved one with a health condition or disability. But unless you’ve lived it, it’s really difficult to understand the full scope of what it means to be a caregiver. 

Caregivers juggle multiple roles. In a single day, a caregiver might be a nurse, a personal chef, a driver, a counselor and an advocate. They manage medications, attend doctor’s appointments, prepare meals, handle household tasks and offer emotional support — all while putting someone else’s needs ahead of their own. If family caregivers in the U.S. were paid for their time, the value of their work would total more than $600 billion each year. But no dollar amount can capture the emotional weight of caring for someone you love.

This kind of care happens every day — and often without recognition. During Autism Acceptance Month this April, it’s especially important to acknowledge the families and caregivers walking alongside adults with autism and other developmental disabilities. Their role is essential and they deserve our gratitude and support.

Family caregivers are the backbone of care for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities, but their own self-care often gets put on the backburner. In this post, we’re shining a light on the people behind the care and five specific ways we can show up to support them.

Caregivers are the Heart of Support for Adults With Disabilities and Complex Medical Needs

Behind many adults with disabilities or those with complex medical needs is a quiet but constant rhythm of care — meals to prepare, medications to manage, needs that shift throughout the day. And often, there’s someone working in the background to hold that rhythm together: a caregiver.

The role of a caregiver isn’t one-size-fits-all. Responsibilities vary depending on the individual’s needs and may shift as a person’s medical condition or disability changes over time. On any given day, caregiving might include:

• Grocery shopping and cooking
• Cleaning and managing the household
• Paying bills and organizing finances
• Administering medication
• Feeding
• Supporting with bathing, grooming, and other hygiene needs
• Coordinating care, scheduling appointments, providing transportation, and advocating at medical visits

This might sound a lot like parenting. In some ways, it is. But it’s also very different from ‘regular” parenting. Typically, we expect active parenting to last until children reach adulthood; however, for some caregivers, their duties can extend well beyond that timeframe. A person with profound disabilities or complex medical needs may need a caregiver for life. That’s a big responsibility for anyone, especially if the demands of care exist 24/7 and resources and support are limited — which they so often are.

Moreover, caregiving is rarely a choice. Becoming a caregiver is often an unexpected role that is thrust upon a person. This kind of support can be isolating. It’s full of moments no one else sees, decisions that feel heavy, and care that goes far beyond a checklist. Yet most caregivers will tell you they’re not doing anything special. They’re just doing what’s needed for someone they love.

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But just because they may not ask for recognition or help, that doesn’t mean they don’t need it.

Five Things You Can Do to Support a Caregiver

You don’t have to walk in a caregiver’s shoes to help lighten their load. In fact, some of the most impactful support comes from quiet, consistent gestures. Whether you’re a friend, family member, neighbor, or community member, here are five thoughtful ways you can show up and make a meaningful difference in a caregiver’s life:

1. Check in Often

A quick “How are you?” is easy to ask, but for caregivers, it can be hard to answer honestly. Too often, admitting you’re struggling (to yourself or others) is regarded as a weakness or failure. For caregivers, this can be especially true. Try reaching out in a way that gives them space to share how they are doing, not just how the person they care for is doing. A thoughtful text, a short voice note, or a simple message like “I’m thinking of you today” can create moments of connection that break through isolation.

P.S. Don’t be discouraged if they don’t respond right away. The point isn’t to get an answer — it’s to remind them you’re there for them.

2. Offer Help That’s Specific, Not Vague

One of the most common things people say is, “Let me know if you need anything.” But that puts the responsibility back on the caregiver to identify a need, find the energy to ask, and hope it’s something the person offering can actually help with.

Instead, try offering something actionable and manageable. Say, “I’m making soup this week. Can I drop some off?” or “I’ll be at the pharmacy this afternoon. Need anything picked up?” You could even say, “I’ve got free time this weekend. Can I come clean the kitchen or walk the dog?”

When you take the guesswork out of helping, it’s easier for caregivers to say yes.

3. Give Respite

Caregiving is a full-time job with no clock-out time, and for many, alone time is a rare luxury. One of the most valuable things you can offer is the opportunity to rest without guilt, worry, or interruption.

If you’re someone the caregiver trusts, offer to spend time with their loved one for an hour or two. It doesn’t have to be complicated. Even time to go for a walk, take a nap, or get errands done can be a huge help. And if you can’t provide coverage yourself, consider helping organize a support schedule, or look into respite care resources they might not be aware of.

‍Caregivers often carry more than just the day-to-day demands — they’re also navigating systems that weren’t built to support them. One way to make a meaningful impact is to advocate for policies and resources that recognize and uplift the needs of caregivers. This could mean supporting paid family leave, pushing for more accessible respite care, or championing better funding for support services in your community.

You can start small. Write to a local representative, share caregiver stories on social media, or support organizations working to change the narrative around caregiving. Caregivers shouldn’t have to fight for the resources that allow them to keep going. When you speak up on their behalf, you help carry that load.

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Let’s Show Up for the People Behind the Care‍

Caregivers rarely ask for the spotlight. But without them, so many of the things we value, like independence, dignity, safety, and stability, would be out of reach for the people they care for. Their work may be quiet, but its impact is profound.

By taking time to notice, support, and advocate for caregivers, we not only ease their burden — we affirm their worth. Whether it's through a thoughtful check-in, a meal dropped at the door, or a voice raised in support of policy change, every small act adds up.

At Coral Reef, we’re building a community where adults with disabilities and the people who care for them feel seen, supported, and valued. But we can’t do it alone. Help us create a place where caregivers are supported, too. Join our mailing list to stay in the loop of how you can support our mission and make this vision a reality.

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